Chaplain's Own Experience Helps See The Bigger Picture
by U.S. Air Force Staff. Sgt. Joshua Magbanua December 22, 2019
Capt. Genesis Guerrero, a chaplain for the 39th Air Base Wing,
was 17 years old when his family almost fell apart.
It
started with an ugly discovery, then escalated into fits of rage as
he witnessed his parents arguing hysterically: his father, Gene, had
been caught being unfaithful.
“I walked out of my room to
make sure it didn’t escalate to violence because dad had a history
of hitting mom whenever he was angry,” Genesis said.
“They
continued to argue in front of my sister and I,” he recalled. “Mom
was broken and angry, and dad ... who I had never seen cry up to this
point ... was crying and seemed so lost.”
Genesis recounted the
scene as a whirlwind of arguments and expletives ascending further
into chaos, culminating into unexpected terror ... Gene picked up his
sawed-off shotgun and pointed it at his head, preparing to shoot
himself and end it all.
The two siblings pleaded with their
father not to pull the trigger, while their fearful mother sat
frozen.
“He didn’t want to kill himself in front of us, so he
grabbed the keys to his red Chevy Blazer, gun in hand, and said we
would never see him again,” Genesis continued. “As he climbed into
his truck, we began to cry with even more desperation. I tried to
pry the driver’s side door open, but he locked it with his windows
sealed shut.”
October 2, 2019 - U.S. Air Force Capt. Genesis Guerrero, a 39th Air Base Wing chaplain, holds his high school portrait at Incirlik Air Base, Turkey. When he was 17 years old, Guerrero used the picture to successfully dissuade his father from committing suicide. (U.S. Air Force photo by Staff. Sgt. Joshua Magbanua)
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The teenager’s mind raced. He frantically ran
back into the house and grabbed the first thing he saw: his
homecoming portrait. Then he dashed outside just in time to catch
his father shifting the truck’s gear into reverse. He pleaded with
his father through the driver-side window, telling him how much he
loved him and needed him.
“I cried in anguish,” Genesis
recalled. “I pointed at the picture and told him to think about his
family before he killed himself. At that point he opened the door,
took the picture and left. I watched him drive away not knowing if I
would ever see him again.”
“I went back into the house and
sobbed uncontrollably with my mom and sister until we couldn’t cry
anymore,” the chaplain added.
For Genesis, the events of that
day served as a climax in a long and painful chain of events which
began early in his life.
His family hailed from the U.S.
territory of Guam, a small island in the Pacific Ocean. However, due
to his father mingling with the wrong crowd and getting into
trouble, the Guerreros fled more than 1,000 miles away to the
Philippines. After two weeks in the tropical republic, the parents
decided to send their two children out even further ... across the ocean
to the continental U.S. to live with relatives, hoping their
offspring could find a brighter future.
Genesis said he felt
safe, but overwhelmingly alone during his life in exile; he found
himself in a new world, immersed in an unfamiliar culture and living
with people he barely knew.
“My sister and I lived without
our parents in Colorado for about two years,” said Genesis. “There
were many nights I cried myself to sleep, not knowing if I would
ever see my parents again because I struggled with the possibility
that dad could go to jail, or even worse … get murdered.”
There was no one to ease those fears, Genesis recalled, saying
although he and his sister were in a safe environment, they felt
like strangers in their new home.
He described his relatives
as “nice people,” but added, he couldn’t help but feel like a
“stepchild” and an “irritating house guest.”
“They didn’t
sign up to raise four kids, two of which were not their own,” he
said.
Genesis’ mother eventually made her way to the U.S.
without her husband. She moved with her children to a rural town in
Georgia where close to a year later, Gene arrived to reunite with
the family.
Genesis remembered his father being met with a
mixed reception.
“I was always told I was a happy-go-lucky
kid, so I received dad with open arms,” he said. “My sister had the
most difficult time forgiving dad, but mom was relieved because she
finally had her husband back to help shoulder burdens.”
Once
reunited, Genesis remembered the rocky family dynamic as mostly good
until that harrowing night when his father stormed off with his
shotgun, threatening to kill himself.
Genesis said he didn’t
remember much of what happened the rest of the day, only that he
came to grips with the reality his father will make his own
decision.
Thankfully, after hours of terrified waiting, Gene
returned home safely.
When Genesis asked his father what
changed his mind about ending his life, the homecoming portrait was
the answer.
Looking at that photograph helped Gene see the
bigger picture.
“It helped him think of his family,” said
Genesis. “The picture served as a change in perspective.”
But
it wasn’t just his dad who had to change, because the younger
Guerrero explained he also needed a new perspective ... and a change of
heart as well. He harbored bitterness because his father’s troubled
lifestyle sent the whole family into exile.
It was not until
Genesis said he discovered his faith at the age of 18 when he began
yet another difficult journey: the path to healing.
He
described forgiveness as the first step to healing, and the most
challenging one as well.
“I blamed my dad for everything at
one point,” he said. “Dad’s immaturity and poor decisions moved us
halfway around the world and left us struggling to make ends meet.
We went from having everything we wanted and needed in Guam to
living in low-income housing in south Georgia.”
Genesis
didn’t want to forgive his dad, but was encouraged by a close friend
of his who reminded him about one of the principles of his newfound
Christian faith: forgive because you have been forgiven.
And
so he made an effort to reconcile with his dad, adding it was a long
process with many obstacles. But as he continued working through
this relationship, he found even at the end of a painful history,
one could start a new and hopeful chapter.
“I got a chance
to develop a good relationship with my dad,” Genesis said. “We got a
chance to talk about a lot of things. It was cool just to have a
man-to-man conversation with him, and to hear his heart behind it
all.”
This reconciliation between father and son manifested
in one of the most poignant ways: on Genesis’ wedding day, when Gene
served as one of his son’s best men.
“I had two best men at
my wedding: my dad, and my best friend who helped me forgive my
dad,” said Genesis. “It was such a privilege to have both my
biological and spiritual fathers to encourage me on such an
important day in my life.”
It was the process of grace,
faith, forgiveness and reconciliation which Genesis said helped him
in the journey to healing. It helped him rebuild his relationship
with his father and find peace within himself.
Now, as a
chaplain in the U.S. Air Force, he strives to help Airmen find inner
peace as well.
“In order to truly have peace in your heart,
you have to be willing to forgive,” he said. “Until then you are
suffering in silence.”
Genesis added along with forgiveness,
a change of perspective is also needed to guide people along in
their process of finding peace.
To illustrate his point, he
described a cross: once instrument of death and torment in ancient
times, it now symbolizes hope and healing for billions of people
around the world ... both religious and not.
“For me, that's what
faith can offer,” the chaplain said. “It gives you a different lens
through which to look at life: a lens of hope that shows me no
matter what my circumstances are, they don't define me.”
Gene
Guerrero eventually passed away in 2012 due to natural causes.
Genesis expressed how grateful he was for the opportunities to spend
time with his father before saying goodbye for the last time.
Although they stumbled on a broken road in separate journeys, he
concluded they both saw life through a new lens … and gazed upon a
bigger picture which saved their lives.
“Since then, I’ve
been able to look back and slowly connect the dots that seemed so
fuzzy at one point,” he said. “And now I want to help people see all
of life, both the tragedies and triumphs. For me this begins with
serving my wife, four children and the Airmen my God has entrusted
me to care for.”
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